haiku: stalk me and i will give you hugs

i want you to know

that i have five pairs of blue

polka dot boxers

a poem

someone.

throw a deus ex machina into my life.

or be my deus ex machina.

i would too fucking happy and grateful.

this is not my future, it is his

i want to take a 'lethal dose' of 'polonium 210'

and be immune to it.

i would have dodged a 'slow and inevitable death'.

that would be 'pretty cool'.

scientists would want to do tests of me.

but i would not give in.

the scientists would say 'if you let us do tests on you,

you would help advance society and everyone

would be immune to poisonous things. plus,

we will give you lots of money.'

i would say 'no, i dont want your money.

the only way i would let you do tests on me

is if you figure out a way to make my nails stop growing

because i don't like cutting them. it is such a hassle.

i also dont like it when people cut my nails for me

because i have the fear that they will mess up

and cut too deep and cause me great pain.'

you smell nice.

i am behind you.

crouching.

just pretend im your shadow.

dim my vision

i should try out some sunglasses soon.

i dont want want to wonder

for the rest of my life

if sunglasses look good on me.

salmon

one day i am going to make a decision

that i will regret.

i will want to 'end my life'

but i will be scared to do it.

i will eat a lot of fucking fish

and i will not get mercury poisoning.

i will be healther than usual.

chess hurts

i was telling this girl

that i won the tornament

in chess club at school

i felt proud.

she gave me a

playful punch

and it hurt.

i took it like a man

externally

but

i felt inferior.

the paranoid male public bathroom experience

i stood up and walked to the bathroom
and used the toilet paper as tissue
i felt a little nervous and confused
but the two ply felt comfy on my nose
unlike the ones in school
where you have to keep pulling and pulling
until you have enough toilet paper in your hand
to wipe your ass or your nose
and then wash your hands
and because the electric hand dryer is broken
you go and get more one ply toilet paper
to dry your hands
and then even more
so you can open the door
without touching the doorknob
because many people dont wash their hands
and you dont want to touch the germs
that are on their genitals
but if you are in a restroom
standing there with wet hands
panicking because there is
nothing to dry your hands
wipe them on your jeans
where your ankles are
because no one really looks there
unless their head is fixed
at a downward angle
and when you need to open the door
you can wait awkwardly
until someone opens it for you
or you can attempt to open it
with your feet
but you look around you
before you do things like that
but once you get the door open
you feel proud of yourself
and wonder how many people
open doors with their feet
to avoid touching doorknobs
and this poem applies
to public restrooms and doors in general

triple haiku: moosik

he stared at the crowd.

nervous, the first chord was struck.

and so it began.

everyone was wrapped

in the blanket of music

enjoying the life.

the last chord echoed.

shouts of encore had faded

and so it ended.

haiku: the man.

echoing click clacks.

the dress shoes resonate as

he strolls through my brain.

haiku: piano.

the fragile fingers

delicately dancing on

the black and white field.

new years

as i walked around outside

the streets deserted. covered with snow.

i heard a YAY at exactly twelve.

then popping. everywhere.

i'm happy that i wore a comfy coat.

happy holidays

i sit in my house

reading Lo and watching films

yet i am so bored.

haiku: friend

why hello, dear friend

i don't know what you don't know

let's go exploring

haiku: fly

under the blanket

was a child trying to fly.

he fell, thumb in mouth.

a short film about love haiku

watching from the room

he saw magda spill the milk

she wept tears, he bled